I never thought I would or could write a book. I never thought such a literary task was within me. But today, my first book is published by Academica – a proper publishing house. Proud is not how I describe my current state of mind, the most appropriate work is shocked.
I am shocked that I managed to finish such a task. Sixty thousand words is a lot for an ill-educated, poor kid off a council estate.
I am shocked that I had the ability to complete it. I failed my English 'O' Level exam 5 times before finally passing. I did not go to university and I only read books on holiday.
I am shocked that a company wants to publish it and thinks they will make a profit out of doing so.
The only skill I possess that may be beneficial in such an endeavour is my storytelling ability to hold an audience. But in my case, this is a verbal skill. Can I transfer it to the written word? Book sales will be the ultimate judge.
I started writing the book during my summer of pain – I had to do something, self-pity and alcohol were calling very loudly to me. I knew they were not the answer but they were very tempting. I decided to write an article on what had happened to me as a warning to others, but also as a cathartic exercise for myself. I needed to find out where my mistakes had been so they would not be repeated. Only a fool repeats the same mistake.
Before I could finish the article, I had beaten cancel culture and was victorious. It had been surprisingly easy. There was no point in finishing my article for what people wanted to know now was how did I manage to win? A new article was started.
The more I wrote, the more I learnt about myself. I recalled different personal experiences and situations that had toughened me up. They had made me resilient, gave me confidence, and the opportunity to look into the eyes of danger and not back down. It was as if my whole life had been a training programme for the fight of my life.
My life had been tough. Assaulted. Robbed at gunpoint. Domestic violence. Homelessness. Speech impediment. Failing school. Fatherless. Family mental illness.
I split my new article into two sections and continued to write. It was while in bed that evening that it hit me – splitting the book into two sections was the same as writing two chapters. Chapters make a book - 'Am I writing a book?' The smile on my face as I rolled over told me the answer. I was.
The next day, I drafted potential chapter headings with related notes, examples and personal stories. The chapter headings came very easily, except the last two. I ignored the problem of how the book would conclude and started my mammoth task.
Some days I wrote all day, from morning to evening. I would get into the zone and it would flow. The more I wrote, the more ideas came to the fore. Others days were more difficult, I would struggle to put in a few hours for nothing would manifest itself. I tried to use this time to reread and edit previous chapters. It was a hard slog over 3 months full time.
At some point, I started to think about the ending of the book. Books need endings, stories need endings, films need endings. I needed an ending.
Occasionally, I updated social media on my progress and used the feedback to judge if I was hitting the right topics. One message I received asked if I was offering advice to others on how to be braver? They explained that reading my story would be motivating but not necessarily helpful if no tips were given on how to be courageous. A very good point. I now had my penultimate chapter.
I gave the final chapter a lot of thought and eventually came to the conclusion that it needed to be the real reason why I wanted to write the book. Honesty is the best policy. I wanted to warn others of the danger of the road our country was heading down. I wanted to highlight the enemies of our country. I wanted to show people that the woke can be beaten easily if we push back. My book is this warning and the final chapter spells it out.
My book will not win awards or critical acclaim. But it may change the way you think about society and influence the way you act going forward. If I achieve this then I have achieved my goal and the book will be a success to me.
(My book can be ordered here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Lessons-Courage-Fought-Against-Culture/dp/168053744X/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=lessons+in+courage&qid=1637840365&s=books&sr=1-1 )